3 Reasons Why It Is Okay Not To Be Okay

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Today it’s all about emotions. So, if you are not that interested in this particular subject please scroll down and click on another blog post. As you can see from the title, today I’m going to tell you why it’s okay not to be okay. Too confusing? Maybe not after you finish reading this blog post.

Let me start by saying, we all go through some intense drama at some point in our lives. Therefore, believe me when I say that no one’s life is “perfect”. In my dictionary, there’s no such thing as perfection. If one takes a closer look at things, there’s no such thing as a perfect life, house, job, friend… However, does that mean we are doomed to choose things that are “second best”? No, of course not. But we can definitely choose our perception of reality.

melancholia 2011 kirsten dunst

One can feel unhappy for several reasons. The point that I’m trying to convey today is that it’s okay not to be okay. Sometimes, certain external circumstances can impact one internally in a very negative way. When that time comes, just say: “I’m not okay, so what?” The first part of the sentence is about acknowledging a problem, which is good because the worst thing people can do is to bottle up these unwanted feelings inside of them. The second part of the sentence is about claiming one’s right to feel however they want to. Since when it’s the norm to feel nothing but happiness? Last time I checked we have a wide range of other emotions that can be experienced: anger, disgust, fear and sadness. As much as we don’t like sadness, we need her in our lives too.

Now, here’s a list of reasons why I believe it’s okay not to be okay.

1 – Time To Take Some Action

Sweeping things under the rug is easy, but acknowledging a problem exists is hard. That means actions will need to be taken in order to fix it. Most people don’t want to do that, they rather stay in their own comfortable bubble. Take bullying as an example. I’m sure a lot of emotions are going through the Bullied’s mind and Happiness is not one of them. But hey, experiencing these negative emotions is not always a bad thing. Why? In this case, they can be viewed as a wake up call. This is the moment, when the Bullied should say: “I’m not okay with this” and take actions.

2 – Some Things Are Just Out Of Our Control

Acknowledging something is not okay and being okay with it is also part of adulthood. If adolescence was about trying to fix things, then adulthood should be about embracing the idea that a lot of things are just out of our control. As I see it, personal struggles should be viewed as an opportunity to learn something new. Take body image issues as an example. Everybody has had a part of their body they disliked. As teenagers, we might even have considered changing it. But as adults, I believe we should try our best to embrace it. So… while your teenage self might say “Ew. I hate it!”, your adult self should say “I see it. I’m okay with it.”

3 – Showing Vulnerability Actually Proves Your Strength

In my opinion, personal strength grows from our ability to cope. It’s has nothing to do with feeling happy all the freaking time as some may believe. Putting a brave face when you are on the verge of a meltdown, doesn’t make you a strong person, just a great actor. Therefore, a strong person is someone who is able cope with adversity and is unashamed for feeling pain during the process. This may sound counter-intuitive, but it takes a lot of strength for one to admit that they are not okay. Think about. We all want to appear strong and put together, but what happens from the moment we let our “guard” down? We are giving the opportunity to “outsiders” to judge us. And being okay with, in others words, not giving a f*ck — takes a lot balls and self-confidence.

As you can see, it’s definitely okay not to be okay. Claim your right to feel however you want to feel. Make peace with your decision and take measures to move forward. Actually, Jessie J has a song I believe fits perfectly into this post:

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